das oath

I [state your name here],

Do hereby swear off using my impressive-albiet-limited musical knowledge to impress, intimidate or influence friends, family, acquantances, employers, co-workers, prospective employers and prospective sexual partners.

I realize that erecting a mental depository for history, detritus, ephemera, rumors, urban legends, apocrypha, liner note musings and cryptology was a defense mechanism acquired in adolescence from being [pick one or more] unpopular/fat/uncoordinated/pimply/ awkward/socially maladjusted.

I realize that, at the time, identifying with musical artists was an easy and reletively acceptable form of escapism. I realize that being able to intellectualize my quasi-rebellious obsession with [pick one or more] punk/alt-rock/metal/rap, was a way to forge a personality and justify my leanings. This helped me feel "validated" when people made me feel worthless.

Now that I am an adult, my well-honed habits of hermetic absorption and intellectual browbeating serve me no purpose. I have met many people who enjoy my company because of the quality of my character, not because of the entertaining ways I spout trivia factoids... and certainly not for the depths of my ability to deride things in clever ways. I am currently employed because of my strong work ethic and pleasant demeanor, not because of my judgemental nature and/or the number of records that I own. I have had, at the very least, an adequate number of sexual experiences.

I was so much older then. I'm younger than that now.